AM? WHAT?

Over the past four weeks, my average bed time was somewhere in the neighborhood of 5:00 AM. This morning I got up at 7:00 AM to get ready for my Greek IV class. Greek, for me, has not been at 7:30 since Greek I and II.

My alarm went off this morning, and I literally almost screamed. Then when I realized that it was my alarm, I almost cried.

I have a 7:30 and an 8:30 class, but no 9:30. So I have a big stupid break at 9:30. This semester is going to be rough.

I decided a long time ago that the AM is supposed to be at the end of the day and not at the beginning of the day. I have no idea what's going on right now. I feel drunk, and I'm just waiting for LOST season 3 to start. THE END.

WINTER NIGHTS

This winter break has been interesting. My hopes were very high. It seemed that my expectations were a little too optimistic for a moment. Yet here I am. I'm finally experiencing some life again. This break has been both disappointing and completely surprising at the same time. It's not that it turned out bad, it just simply turned out much different than I thought it would.

Christmas was great. So many years had been earmarked by materialism and jealousy over gifts, friendships, and family ties. But this year was somehow different. This year was authentic and beautiful. It seemed that my parents spent less money on gifts this year, and somehow the entire day was more fulfilling. Everyone seemed to be genuinely connecting and enjoying the company of those around them. It was refreshingly simple and authentically merry.

I've been spending time with friends these days. For the first few weeks, I was basically flying solo. Tonight was great for instance. Josh and Jaclyn came over to my house. Josh did impressions of comedian Todd Barry doing Star Trek characters and Jaclyn wowed us with her recitation of the Greek alphabet which I had only taught her the night before.

Eric met up with us and we were off. We went to Josh's house to get some things and talked about the idea of getting another tattoo tonight. He didn't. We left there and listened to some Explosions In The Sky and Josh Ritter. I would strongly recommend checking out those artists.

We met up with James at Starbucks and proceeded to Paddy's. Paddy's is one of those immortal anomalies which will remain in my heart forever. It's a hole-in-the-wall Irish pub. We started out with some stew. Amazing. James ordered some Curry Chips. Equally amazing. I got bagers and mash, which is sausage, mashed potatoes, squash, cherry tomatoes, and a roll. This food is so heavy you could sink the Titanic with it, again. Since the waitress, who has waited on us many times in the past, forgot to put my order in at first, so she offered us free desert. We ordered the bread pudding. Titanic, prepare to sink once more.

Now we are at Nordaggio's coffee house. I absolutely love this place. The night is close to perfect, and yet, I know somehow that it's only beginning. I'm feeling that feeling again. You know the one. Love is in the air and I'm gonna go get my coffee.

Dan

Listening to: Explosions In The Sky

DON'T FORCE IT

Trying to force artistry is like trying to get the really annoying girl at the party to not talk - You might get a few sympathy points for trying, but it just aint happening.

For several days now, I have been in a creative drought. I've been listening to a lot of good music these days. I've been surrounding myself with all the things and people that inspire me on a regular basis. All those familiar faces and places, I've got them all. Yet for some reason, when I sit down with my guitar and a notebook, all I can seem to do fake my way through some uninspired lick or generic recycled line.

Sometimes I get cold feet. I listen to all this great stuff, look at all this great art, read all these great books, watch all these great movies - and then I find myself saying "you're not gonna make anything as good as that." I keep comparing myself to other people, wondering if I'm gonna stack up. Sometimes I foget that I do my best stuff when it's just me and my head is clear and I couldn't possibly care less what people think - when I've got something personal to say, when it strikes me.

I guess I've just been trying to force it. I feel all these amazing songs just sitting in my brain, and I can't find the way to get them out of there and onto the page. Maybe I've been too wrapped up in execution and the process. Maybe I need to let myself be submerged in circumstance. If I just let life happen and make the most of every day, maybe I'll observe something worth writing about along the way. Maybe instead of resorting to the things which, until now, have been sure fire inspirations - maybe I should give something unexpected the chance to be inspiring.

That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to put the guitar up and stop looking over at it. I'm going to stop looking at the empty page. But as soon as life happens, I'll be there to take notes.

-dan